From The Late Show with David Letterman:
And from the Home Office in Wahoo, Nebraska, here are the Top Ten Things Going Through This Guy's Mind At This Moment
10. "Thought the third base coach was giving me the 'jump' sign"
9. "Will I get to watch the end of the game in my jail cell?"
8. "Figured I'd beat the traffic"
7. "If I had a girlfriend, she'd be impressed"
6. "I'm sure Steinbrenner won't mind"
5. "If Marv Albert uses this, I hope he adds a comical 'bong!'"
4. "Giambi said that stuff he gave me would make me fly"
3. "I hope they do some funny jokes about this on Leno!"
2. "I wonder if the newspaper will refer to me as a 'moron' or an 'idiot'"And the Number One Thing Going Through This Guy's Mind At This Moment,
1. "If a drunken stooge can't disgrace himself at sporting events, then the terrorists have won"