Wednesday, October 05, 2005
I Predict a Riot
- I'm not the first person to bash and loathe Tim McCarver, I'm not the last. But last night, in the top of the first, I heard something troubling.
After Derek Jeter, the greatest fistpumper (double entendre not intentional) in the history of the game, grounded out to Shaun/Shawn/Sean/Chone 5-3, Alex Rodriguez, the greatest blue-lipped player in the history of the game, came to the plate.
Joe Buck had been talking. McCarver contributed an "ooh." Not an ordinary "ooh," but one sounding more sultry. Naughty, even.
Buck was taken aback. "Ooh?"
Two pitches later, McCarver lets out an even more heartfelt "Ooh!" If the first "ooh" was leading up to the apex, this was le fin. He, um, arrived at his destination. And that's just wrong.
- At some point, if history repeats itself - and on occasion over the last 87 years it has, maybe Scott Podsednik would slide into Tek, miss the plate, and then be tagged out.
More of that coming from the Jeff Horrigan's keyboard.
- The ChiSox will not win another game. They will not score 14 runs collectively the rest of the way. The next time they return to Chicago will be to clean out their lockers and set up a tee time in Idlewild.
- Enough with the Matt Clement-come-Derek Lowe comparisons. Enough with the Derek Lowe stuff altogether. You folks remember when D-Lowe came into the playoffs last year? Yep. In the 10th inning after there were NO MORE PITCHERS. Timlin gave up a the grannie to Vlad. He and the artists formerly known as Alan Embree and Keith Foulke combined for 73 pitches over six innings.
Lowe came in, got Devanon to F8, he walked one of the Molinas, a sac bunt got him to 2nd, the scrappy little shortstop singled before Shaun/Shawn/Sean/Chone 6-3'ed.
He stepped up big in the ALCS and World Series. That's it. Lightning in a bottle for a guy who was in the rotation all 2004, sporting one of the worst ERA's among AL starters.
- My keys to the game yesterday...some came true, some not so much.
It was encouraging to see Tony Graffanino's bat as the second-leadoff hitter...the 6-7-8 guys were the only ones that manufactured a run...
The pitching, um, not so much.
- By the way, it's only 1-0. You don't get points for leading halfway through the game; it's not the CBA.
- 8-1. That's the Red sox' record in "must-win" or elimination games over the past two years. Today fits that bill. It will be 9-1 tomorrow.
- Wow. Was just in the other office and read about Bill Bennett's comments the other day regarding "eliminating" crime in America by "aborting black babies."
That's staggering. I mean, um, wow. How do you even...I...um...huh? Even more staggering, coming from the author of the "Book of Virtues."
Bill, don't even try to say you were taken out of context. There is no context. Trust me, I am not the P.C. police. And, trust me, you are not Johnathan Swift and your comments were not the 21st century's "Modest Proposal."
C'est ca! Un.
After Derek Jeter, the greatest fistpumper (double entendre not intentional) in the history of the game, grounded out to Shaun/Shawn/Sean/Chone 5-3, Alex Rodriguez, the greatest blue-lipped player in the history of the game, came to the plate.
Joe Buck had been talking. McCarver contributed an "ooh." Not an ordinary "ooh," but one sounding more sultry. Naughty, even.
Buck was taken aback. "Ooh?"
Two pitches later, McCarver lets out an even more heartfelt "Ooh!" If the first "ooh" was leading up to the apex, this was le fin. He, um, arrived at his destination. And that's just wrong.
- At some point, if history repeats itself - and on occasion over the last 87 years it has, maybe Scott Podsednik would slide into Tek, miss the plate, and then be tagged out.
More of that coming from the Jeff Horrigan's keyboard.
- The ChiSox will not win another game. They will not score 14 runs collectively the rest of the way. The next time they return to Chicago will be to clean out their lockers and set up a tee time in Idlewild.
- Enough with the Matt Clement-come-Derek Lowe comparisons. Enough with the Derek Lowe stuff altogether. You folks remember when D-Lowe came into the playoffs last year? Yep. In the 10th inning after there were NO MORE PITCHERS. Timlin gave up a the grannie to Vlad. He and the artists formerly known as Alan Embree and Keith Foulke combined for 73 pitches over six innings.
Lowe came in, got Devanon to F8, he walked one of the Molinas, a sac bunt got him to 2nd, the scrappy little shortstop singled before Shaun/Shawn/Sean/Chone 6-3'ed.
He stepped up big in the ALCS and World Series. That's it. Lightning in a bottle for a guy who was in the rotation all 2004, sporting one of the worst ERA's among AL starters.
- My keys to the game yesterday...some came true, some not so much.
It was encouraging to see Tony Graffanino's bat as the second-leadoff hitter...the 6-7-8 guys were the only ones that manufactured a run...
The pitching, um, not so much.
- By the way, it's only 1-0. You don't get points for leading halfway through the game; it's not the CBA.
- 8-1. That's the Red sox' record in "must-win" or elimination games over the past two years. Today fits that bill. It will be 9-1 tomorrow.
- Wow. Was just in the other office and read about Bill Bennett's comments the other day regarding "eliminating" crime in America by "aborting black babies."
That's staggering. I mean, um, wow. How do you even...I...um...huh? Even more staggering, coming from the author of the "Book of Virtues."
Bill, don't even try to say you were taken out of context. There is no context. Trust me, I am not the P.C. police. And, trust me, you are not Johnathan Swift and your comments were not the 21st century's "Modest Proposal."
C'est ca! Un.
