Monday, October 10, 2005
In Fourteen Hundred and Ninety-Two
Welcome! Happy Columbo Day. Here's stuff:
Go! Fight! Win!
-----
This here's a story about a new Concorde SST jet. The designers claim that this new jet can hold 5x as many passengers and fly at Mach 5.
If you're scoring at home, that would put a NY to London trip at about one hour.
Great idea. Go for it. Just don't book me on the maiden voyage. CoughcoughTITANICcoughcough.
-----
Oh, here's some hard hitting news that the Boston Dirt Dog fraud is prolly pouncing on (by the way, stop using the "We're Juice Guys" graphic without giving me credit. And whichever criminal is selling those tee-shirts near Fenway, I should get a buck a shirt. But I digress.)
Manny wants to play for the White Sox.
You know what? There are prolly about 24 other guys who'd like to be on Ozzie's team now.
But this coming from Manny, I can see exactly how this came about. Right about an hour after the Red Sox lost in the ALDS and the White Sox were celebrating, Manny was asking people what time they had to be at the ballpark the next day.
Big Papi: We don't have to be here tomorrow. We lost. Our season is over.
Manny: Who were we playing?
Big Papi: The White Sox. You remember, you hit two home runs...
Manny: Against who?
Big Papi: The White Sox.
Manny: Who is that drinking beer and champagne in the other clubhouse? I like doing that.
Big Papi: It's the White Sox, they're going to the ALCS.
Manny: I want to go, too.
Big Papi: But you can't. We lost. Our season is over.
Manny: I want to play for the White Sox, too.
Big Papi: Ok, then. I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Manny: I like SpongeBob. And that starfish Patrick is mad funny.
Well, that's just my guess. But I'm sure it's pretty close. The SpongeBob bit, too.
-----
This just in from the AP transaction wire:
Strong Island Sound (ABA) - Signed guard Lloyd Daniels.
I can't figure out what's better: the fact that some team, somewhere, is paying Swee'Pea to play basketball - or - the fact that there is some team named the Strong Island Sound.
I need a t-shirt of this team. And I hope that the brothers from Brentwood, L.I. ... Erick and Parrish Making Dollars ... Erick and Parrish Microphone Doctors .. EPMD ... I hope they're the halftime entertainment.
-----
Oh, this just in from Clearwater, Fla. Reports that Red Sox All-Star slugger wants to switch teams is surfacing once again.
Ramirez, fresh off a large chili and cheese burger (with onion rings) at Fuddrucker's - America's Greatest Hamburgers - has announced his intention to join the busstaff and short-order cooks as a part of their semi-slow pitch Thursday softball league team.
Efforts to reach Ramirez' old and new agents, Theo Epstein, and the guy at the counter who speaks into the microphone to tell the grill guys how to cook the burgers, were unsuccessful.
-----
-----
I saw that Drew Bledsoe and Keyshawn Johnson got into it. Apparently, Drew told Keyshawn to "hold onto the ball" after the latter got sandwiched and turned the ball over.
I'm a Drew guy. Always was. Always will be. From getting ticketed for open container in Newport after he got drafted, to stagediving to Everclear at the Avalon, to the Super Bowl the Pats lost, to almost dying a Mo Lewis death, to the Super Bowl that the Pats won. But for Drew to b*tch about a teammate turning the ball over is like Kevin Millar telling someone to start
hitting homeruns or fielding grounders.
-----
This clown does two. Bitter.
And I'm getting over being just one seat away from a TLBR newbie catching a juiced up ball from juiced up Jason Giambi a few seasons ago at the Toilet.
-----
I hate to be cold-hearted in light of a natural catastrophe, but I hope if the U.S. government is quick to cut checks to aid those affected, it goes to the folks in the "Katrina" file before it goes to those in the "Kashmir" file.
-----
Staring at Christina Aguilera's ass when singing the national anthem - it's called Bruins: http://www.wwtdd.com/images/ca4.shtml
-----
From the home office in Milwaukee, WI - because guess what, that's where the new home office is - comes this.
The Onion was already the greatest newspaper in the history of the galaxy. This just takes it to another galaxy and a new history. Or something.
-----
That's enough.
Go Halos! Go me! Go you! Go do something for a change!
One.
Go! Fight! Win!
-----
This here's a story about a new Concorde SST jet. The designers claim that this new jet can hold 5x as many passengers and fly at Mach 5.
If you're scoring at home, that would put a NY to London trip at about one hour.
Great idea. Go for it. Just don't book me on the maiden voyage. CoughcoughTITANICcoughcough.
-----
Oh, here's some hard hitting news that the Boston Dirt Dog fraud is prolly pouncing on (by the way, stop using the "We're Juice Guys" graphic without giving me credit. And whichever criminal is selling those tee-shirts near Fenway, I should get a buck a shirt. But I digress.)
Manny wants to play for the White Sox.
You know what? There are prolly about 24 other guys who'd like to be on Ozzie's team now.
But this coming from Manny, I can see exactly how this came about. Right about an hour after the Red Sox lost in the ALDS and the White Sox were celebrating, Manny was asking people what time they had to be at the ballpark the next day.
Big Papi: We don't have to be here tomorrow. We lost. Our season is over.
Manny: Who were we playing?
Big Papi: The White Sox. You remember, you hit two home runs...
Manny: Against who?
Big Papi: The White Sox.
Manny: Who is that drinking beer and champagne in the other clubhouse? I like doing that.
Big Papi: It's the White Sox, they're going to the ALCS.
Manny: I want to go, too.
Big Papi: But you can't. We lost. Our season is over.
Manny: I want to play for the White Sox, too.
Big Papi: Ok, then. I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Manny: I like SpongeBob. And that starfish Patrick is mad funny.
Well, that's just my guess. But I'm sure it's pretty close. The SpongeBob bit, too.
-----
This just in from the AP transaction wire:
Strong Island Sound (ABA) - Signed guard Lloyd Daniels.
I can't figure out what's better: the fact that some team, somewhere, is paying Swee'Pea to play basketball - or - the fact that there is some team named the Strong Island Sound.
I need a t-shirt of this team. And I hope that the brothers from Brentwood, L.I. ... Erick and Parrish Making Dollars ... Erick and Parrish Microphone Doctors .. EPMD ... I hope they're the halftime entertainment.
-----
Oh, this just in from Clearwater, Fla. Reports that Red Sox All-Star slugger wants to switch teams is surfacing once again.
Ramirez, fresh off a large chili and cheese burger (with onion rings) at Fuddrucker's - America's Greatest Hamburgers - has announced his intention to join the busstaff and short-order cooks as a part of their semi-slow pitch Thursday softball league team.
Efforts to reach Ramirez' old and new agents, Theo Epstein, and the guy at the counter who speaks into the microphone to tell the grill guys how to cook the burgers, were unsuccessful.
-----
-----
I saw that Drew Bledsoe and Keyshawn Johnson got into it. Apparently, Drew told Keyshawn to "hold onto the ball" after the latter got sandwiched and turned the ball over.
I'm a Drew guy. Always was. Always will be. From getting ticketed for open container in Newport after he got drafted, to stagediving to Everclear at the Avalon, to the Super Bowl the Pats lost, to almost dying a Mo Lewis death, to the Super Bowl that the Pats won. But for Drew to b*tch about a teammate turning the ball over is like Kevin Millar telling someone to start
hitting homeruns or fielding grounders.
-----
This clown does two. Bitter.
And I'm getting over being just one seat away from a TLBR newbie catching a juiced up ball from juiced up Jason Giambi a few seasons ago at the Toilet.
-----
I hate to be cold-hearted in light of a natural catastrophe, but I hope if the U.S. government is quick to cut checks to aid those affected, it goes to the folks in the "Katrina" file before it goes to those in the "Kashmir" file.
-----
Staring at Christina Aguilera's ass when singing the national anthem - it's called Bruins: http://www.wwtdd.com/images/ca4.shtml
-----
From the home office in Milwaukee, WI - because guess what, that's where the new home office is - comes this.
The Onion was already the greatest newspaper in the history of the galaxy. This just takes it to another galaxy and a new history. Or something.
-----
That's enough.
Go Halos! Go me! Go you! Go do something for a change!
One.
