Stalking: Frowned Upon In Milwaukee. With the recent developments here in Milwaukee - as a woman has been stalking the voice of the Brewers, Bob Uecker - I do need to proceed with caution.

I've always said that if I met Dave Roberts, I'd buy him a beer. Or whatever he drinks - diet coke, carrot juice, gin n' juice, gin n' carrots, whatever - and just say thanks.

Not "thanks, beautiful." (see right.) Just, thanks.

And in case you've been living in a cave since Sept. 2004, and that cave is the only one without Fox or ESPN or NESN, then I'll give you a refresher course about Dave Roberts.

The Red Sox acquired him in a trade from the Los Angeles Dodgers, in exchange for the immortal Henri Stanley.

Roberts served as a 4th/5th outfielder for the Sox during the closing days of the 2004 season.

He appeared in 45 games, but saw limited action at the plate - just 86 AB.

In the ALDS & ALCS, he had zero at-bats.

But he did pinch run.

In the ninth inning of game four of the ALCS, Kevin Millar walked. He was replaced by Roberts, who proceeded to, well, take a look.



After the steal, Bill Mueller came up with a basehit, scoring the speedy outfielder from second. People seemed to enjoy this.



So as the Padres open up a three-game series here in Brew City, the goal is to meet Mr. Roberts, shake his hand, thank him for sliding away from the intangibly Jeterian tag, and then for his hustle to score on Mueller's base hit, tying the game and helping to set up the first of two consecutive, heroic game-winning hits for David Ortiz (one and two).

That's about it. Hope Beckett doesn't throw the straight fast ones tonight and remembers what it was like to shit on the Yankees in the Toilet, circa 2003.

To the next step (whenever it calls back).

One.  ¶ 6:02 PM