April 24

9:32 a.m. – I’m on the water taxi to Caye Caulker. I’m leaving La Isla Bonita for La Isla, um, something. I think I just saw Whitey Bulger.

10:37 a.m. – Ok, so we’ve established that San Pedro (La Isla Bonita) was gorgeous. Welcome to Caye Caulker. The “downside,” according to some folks, is that Caulker is boring. Ok, so what’s the problem? Found a spot across from the hotel and – wow – this place is nice. It’s a small island, about four miles by less than a mile, so I’ll be doing some walking today. Got the last room at Mara’s Place, so the luck is growing by the minute.

In front of Mara’s, my man Kent is selling some of his handicrafts. Necklaces, masks, and other stuff…none of which I have much interest in. He approached me and started talking about some of his relationship problems and how he views the differences between men and women. All this while wearing a Conrad McRae jersey. Men are from Mars, Women from Venus. (RIP, McNasty…too soon…)

1 p.m. – Took a little catnap in the room, then ventured out to sit on the pier by the calm Caribbean. It’s just me, my thoughts, my trusty notebook, and a book that I’m close to finishing (finally). That is, until two little kids thought it was fine time to start a cannonball contest. Terrific. Time to regroup. Time for lunch.

(Stewed chicken, rice, beans, cole slaw, Belikin. Lather, rinse, repeat)

Since the isle is small and easy to maneuver, I decided I’d take some photos with the trusty digital camera.

1:44 p.m. – Found a sports bar on the island. And they have NESN. I scribbled a makeshift resignation letter, took an empty Belikin bottle, and sent it on its way to Kingston.

2 p.m. – Executive decision just made: there’s no point in leaving before Monday. Water taxi to San Pedro at some point, 3 p.m. boat back to Corozal. Island living in between.

2:24 p.m – The Sox are losing to the Angels. The Backstreet Boys are on the jukebox (that makes you larger than life…). Normally, either one of those two situations would set me off.

2:30 p.m. – One of the other TV’s here at Lloyd’s has ESPNU and NCAA men’s gymnastics. Who knew? Why bother? Who is watching that shit? Just met Lloyd, the proprietor of this fine establishment. He claims to have the best food on the island. Well, I’m a tough critic and have no interest in pub food. But good on you for a little self-promotion, Lloyd.

He said to come back for the hockey game(s) tonight. Sorry, but I think I’ll be washing my hair.

5:17 p.m. – A nice, refreshing shower, some SportsCenter, and then off to dinner. Not sure what’s on the menu. I suppose I should take Lloyd at his word, right?

5:41 p.m. – But first, I headed next door to the Lazy Lizard – a place that touts itself as a sunny place for shady people. It’s where the shady people also come to watch a nifty sunset every night.

There’s a boat docked out back of the Lizard, which is located right on the Split (in 1961, Hurricane Hattie split the island in two…we’re located on the South end.). The boat had a great sign on the side of it: Great People Talk About Ideas; Normal People Talk About Things. And then there’s Salt n’ Pepa. They talked about sex.

6:12 p.m. – Ok, literally, if you turned away for 5-10 seconds while the sun started setting, you missed it. Oh well, I missed it. There will be other sunsets. The sun will come out tomorrow. I’ll bet my bottom Belizean dollar. If it doesn’t, then it would suck.

6:57 p.m. – Lloyd may have oversold his claim, but it was solid. Had the jalapeno pasta – essentially penne with vodka sauce and jalapenos. However, Bill Raftery doing the Magic/Raptors game is the best thing cooking anywhere in the world.

Met a nice group of Canadians – all from Vancouver – who were there for the hockey. I stayed for the hockey, too. (I washed my hair, but didn’t use conditioner).

8:58 p.m. – Icing call. Time to head back toward Mara’s and the Lizard. This will be the tipping point – early to bed or head to karaoke night.

The Lizard has a poster hanging up called “Beerdrinking”- a play off the opening monologue by Marc Renton in the movie “Trainspotting.” What a brilliant movie that was. I think someone stole my DVD copy of it back at Iona.

9:47 p.m. – Just met Harry, the proprietor of the Lizard and the major real estate developer here on Caulker. Some very interesting real estate deals going on here; they all piqued my interest. But something tells me that it’s not good business to buy your second home before you buy your first…

Speaking of home…it’s about that time. Put SportsCenter on the sleep timer, add some rested to my mix of “tanned” and “ready,” and enjoy another day in paradise…